An upset woman with her hand to her head.

Has Your Friendship Become an Emotional Affair?

Are you on a slippery slope to an emotional affair?

Answer the following questions to determine if your friendship has become an emotional affair.

  1. Do you confide more to your friend than to your spouse about how your day went?
  2. Do you discuss negative feelings or intimate details about your marriage with your friend but not with your spouse?
  3. Are you open with your spouse about the extent of your involvement with your friend?
  4. Would you feel comfortable if your spouse heard your conversation with your friend?
  5. Would you feel comfortable if you spouse saw a videotape of your meetings?
  6. Are you aware of sexual tensions in this friendship?
  7. Do you and your friend touch differently when you’re alone than in front of others?
  8. Are you in love with your friend?

Scoring Key

Give yourself one point each for yes to questions 1, 2, 6, 7, 8 and one point each for no to 3, 4, 5.

If you scored near 0, this is just a friendship.

If you scored 3 or more, you may not be “just friends.”

If you scored 7-8 you are definitely involved in an emotional affair.

From Not “Just Friends”: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity by Shirley Glass.